Did LMH again today as I am driving tomorrow as have to pick up the dogs. Started of like an olympic sprinter but ended up like Neil Armstrong on the Moon.

Nevermind. Got a couple of stories swirling in my head thanks to the walk. But have to get a couple finished before I venture into greener pastures.

The long march was achieved with the help of Nickleback, James Morrison and others. I just stomped all the way to the in-laws.

Boring day at work. No structure there at the moment, like a boat that has skipped its anchor.

I have booked a beginners course skiing at the end of the month so am in training so that i don't get laughed off the slope. I broke into another new stonage. Only about a dozen left to go. Where I am started from, specifics don't help.

The story, I have published a bit of in on a website and there have been positive comment and they would like more but I just don't have the time to get into that place right now. I am on my second assignment for my MSc and I passed the first one but dismally so need to do better this time.

Not to sure what the challenge of the day will be for tomorrow. I may do the LMH but I have the start of a blister on my left foot.

Step one.... The long march home

I am going to walk home from work. We not exactly home but to the in-laws house. I will arm myself with my IPod classic, a suitable pace setting soundtrack and a headset of determination. Too the moon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I need to sort myself out!!!!!!!

In almost two years I am going to be 40. Forty. Four.... Ow.

Am scared. I will be OLD. A Old person.

I need to give myself a list/promise/present for my 40th Year.

Forget the damn olympics, it is MY year.

plans are afoot to inject my life with a much needed adrenaline short.

MY BUCKET LIST..... WHAT I PROMISE YOU, TRICKLETREE, TO HAVE ACHIEVED BY YOUR FORTIETH BIRTHDAY....

1. To look in the mirror and LOVE what I see.

- Get fit

- Get slim

- Get style (whatever it may be, preferably rock chick with an edge)

2. Be happy with myself, who I am, what I have achieved.

3. Gain my Masters and start on my Phd for my fiftieth gift

4. Take up skiing.

5. Take up scuba diving.

6. Finish a novel and be pleased with it.

7. Learn to not give a f*ck what anyone thinks of me.

8. Have loads of sex.

9. Read... read and what was that read.

10. BE THE PERSON I WANT TO BE INSIDE AND OUT!!!!!!

I get these huge crushes on men, I would follow them off a cliff. I think it is because they are living aspect of the life I want to live.

I need to pull my finger out and start finding out what that is. I need to carve myself out of this marble cage. Wanderer, intellectual, academic, hippy, lover, doggie mum, sexy wife, adventurer, a tall glass of water.

Today is the 31st January 2010 and I have two years and three months to achieve perfection. I shall keep you posted.

Full of doubts

I am on a mission to get a novel finished. I have written 30 000 words and hope to reach a target of 120 000. Patience isn't one of my strong points but it has taken two years to get here.

I find that when I am writing loads of other ideas arrive banging on my door. I have at least three other projects on the go but need to focus on one at a time.

It is three and a half months until I start the OU course 'Start Writing Fiction'. I want to follow it up with the Creative Writing Courses and the Writing for Children and that isn't something I know much about.

I have earnt a day off work due to overtime I worked last week. The plan is to do my ironing and put clothes away and settle down for the daily battle with my writing.

Of late I have found that it takes me a while to get into it but when I do it comes and provides me with such a high, beyond chemical intervention (Disclaimer: I would imagine, having had no experience of this first hand.)

It is strange that I have a general knowledge of where I want my book to go but when I start writing I assess a whole different part of my brain which takes me somewhere completely difference and a whole fictional world is revealed to me as if I am just writing a commentary of what is going on.

I have a worry about my book. It is the sort of book I would love to read but don't see very often but it is very niche and I wouldn't imagine has very popular appeal but then perhaps I am underestimating the world.

I am trying to get two stories going which are loosely connected but with an over all theme. I feel it will give the reader space to digest each character.

I must get on or I will waste my day in avoidance!

I must get on with some housework.  I really really don't want to but the shirts aren't going to iron themselves.  Off on holiday tomorrow and do not want to come back to a house full of stuff to do.  I am hoping to reunite with my writing self on holiday.  Am taking my little, hamster driven laptop which is my favourite as my husband bought it for me and to me it is a sign of faith that he thinks I have enough talent to invest in.

I have written two screenplays which were completely for my own pleasure and to enjoy rereading as they cover topics than I enjoy reading about.  I have started a novel and got fairly into it when I got stuck in my own mind.  The to alleviate this I started another project, oh what a mistake.  I read on a blog that someone was log jammed and I think that describes it the best.  Yes, way too many ideas, all wanting to be addressed at the same time, all fighting for the sun.

One of my favourite parts of the day was to walk out of work to do home which is great in itself, but I work in a hospital and loved passing the novel stand and pictured my novel on there but it has moved this week and i feel very lost.